I’ve been wondering how long it takes to get over someone and if we can only get over them by meeting someone else. Are we constantly trying to put that person behind us, and when the next one we become entangled with does the trick, do we become caught in a cycle of ‘getting over and getting under’?
I recently met a guy in Charlottesville and we really hit it off. He’s attractive, funny, sociable and successful.
I told my friends that it was a refreshing feeling to feel attracted to someone, do the flirting thing,etc because at one point in my life after I parted ways with someone special, I thought it would be a LONG time since I’d felt the need to be attracted to anyone.
Anyways, this guy I met is also trying to get over someone. He was in a four year relationship, and now, only a few weeks later after the break up, he’s seeing me. When he told me his relationship recently ended, and I stalked his ex-girlfriend on facebook, I saw that it was indeed a long serious relationship–the kind that had pictures of them going on beach trips, and his family being friends with said ex-girlfriend on facebook. I don’t really want to talk about this with him, because it’s probably still fresh and he’s obviously rebounding with me. I don’t know how I feel being that ‘rebound girl’ yet, I certainly am not expecting his guy to be my boyfriend, nor do I want one. I guess it’s kinda nice helping someone deal with the pain of a break-up and knowing what you have with the person you’re seeing is something temporary. You support and lean on each other, in a way.
That aside, his story made me think about how easily we detach ourselves, or at least try to, from our ex-significant others. We go from seeing someone, imagining them on our everyday lives, to kissing a someone completely different, because that’s the thing to do. Should there be a ‘mourning period’ in between the getting over and the getting under someone or does it not matter if we rebound?